True Blood: True Bullshit
Bill Quick

So this is the last season for this long-running vamp series, and frankly, I won’t miss it.

It’s as if the Hollywood progtards writing the thing no longer have to worry about pissing viewers off, and now feel free to just let their freak flags fly.

Here is the content of tonight’s show:

The setup:  “Bad” vampires are beseiging a small southern town.  Many citizens have been murdered by the blood-suckers, and many have simply vanished.  Along with the cops.

The citizens start shouting that they need to defend themselves against the vampires.  They decide they need guns, “but the gun store is closed.”  (This being the rural south, I can’t imagine that every home doesn’t have at least a rifle, a shotgun, and a pistol, but whatever…)

So they decide to raid the police armory.  Where they are met by a black female cop who tells them she’s not gonna give up the guns to “a bunch of NRA-brainwashed lunatics.”

Eventually, though, she is talked around, (There are vampires!  They’re coming back to kill us all!) and lets the citizenry take up arms in their own defense.

We are then treated to a scene in which the townspeople, transformed into brainless yahoos, wave pistols, rifles, and shotguns around like they were plastic toys, shooting holes in the walls and ceilings and (nearly) each other, whooping and hollering as they fall prey to the deadly spell of the evil firearms.

I dunno about you, but if I’ve got vampires coming for me, I want guns, lots and lots of guns, with lots and lots of ammo – although I suspect that the most effective setup might be a 12 gauge pump loaded with solid silver deer slugs.  At the very least, double ought silver buck.  (According to Larry Correia, silver makes lousy bullets, but I can’t see how it would diminish solid slugs and heavy buckshot at close range).

Anyway, this is how the Hollywood folks, who mostly hire their own gunmen for personal protection, look at the rest of us.

 

Bill Quick

About Bill Quick

I am a small-l libertarian. My primary concern is to increase individual liberty as much as possible in the face of statist efforts to restrict it from both the right and the left. If I had to sum up my beliefs as concisely as possible, I would say, "Stay out of my wallet and my bedroom," "your liberty stops at my nose," and "don't tread on me." I will believe that things are taking a turn for the better in America when married gays are able to, and do, maintain large arsenals of automatic weapons, and tax collectors are, and do, not.

Comments

True Blood: True Bullshit — 7 Comments

  1. It was soon discovered that the vampires were really poor, defenseless, minorities with a darker complexion and so the townspeople began donning white hoods and lynching the vampires. Burning crosses and Confederate Flags began to appear. The vampires, with enlightened Democrat help, ambushed all of them when the townspeople went to a Tea Party Rally and chanted “Reagan Uber Alles”. The Townspeople were all killed and the vampires lived happily ever after. The End.

    I just wrote Part 2!

  2. I was kidding. I haven’t seen a single second of a single episode. Thankfully.

    What is wrong with these people? You can’t even satirize them because the most outlandish thing you can think of turns out to be weak tea compared to their reality. “Hollywood” is living in more than just a bubble. They’re in a bubble on a different planet in an alternate universe.

  3. You can’t even satirize them because the most outlandish thing you can think of turns out to be weak tea compared to their reality.

    That’s been my complaint about government for some time, and in particular the NSA. No matter how outlandish an encroachment on the people’s liberties or how flagrant a violation of their proper bounds, you can bet some legislator, executive, or bureaucrat is figuring out how to sneak it in or ram it through. And as for the NSA, their excesses surpass the most paranoid rantings of the (rather paranoid) group I hang out with.

  4. I enjoyed the first three seasons as much of the writing was hilarious and the characters, even the vampires, were mostly likeable (I especially liked Pam, Eric Northman’s partner in Fangtasia, with her sarcastic attitude about most everything). Season four started going off the rails for me and season five hasn’t recaptured the shows mojo that I found so entertaining in the first three seasons. Personally, I would go for silver jacketed wooden bullets to deal with the vamps. Louisiana Rednecks, Vampires, Werewolves, Faeries, and Shifters, Oh My! I considered the show just another opportunity to grab a favorite beverage, sit back, relax, and enjoy the decline of western civilization.

    • Yeah, I liked the first three seasons pretty well, too, and Pam remains my favorite character. Of course, I’d read half a dozen of the original books before I ever watched the show, so that helped.

      The books are better than the show.