I Have a New Hero
Bill Quick

FARGO MAN ARRESTED FOR CLEARING SNOW WITH FLAMETHROWER | Neighbor ShameNeighbor Shame

Flamethrowing-Snow-Story

Fargo, ND – Local resident Todd Fox has been detained for “reckless endangerment” and “illegal use of high-powered fire-breathing weaponry” for attacking snow with his flamethrower. Fox reportedly became so fed up with the week-long blowing snow epidemic in his area that he decided to KILL IT WITH FIRE.

The neighborhood was treated with quite a show last night as Fox unleashed an inferno upon the mountainous snow palace that was his front yard. Neighbors to his immediate right and left noticed a bright orange cloud and could hear what they thought was “puff the magic dragon spewing mayhem all over hell,” which prompted one of them to notify police.

Fox stated that he was simply “fed up with battling the elements” and that he did not possess the willpower necessary to move “four billion tons of white bull shit.”

Tell me you don’t have a secret well of sympathy and understanding for this guy.  Not to mention envy.

Bill Quick

About Bill Quick

I am a small-l libertarian. My primary concern is to increase individual liberty as much as possible in the face of statist efforts to restrict it from both the right and the left. If I had to sum up my beliefs as concisely as possible, I would say, "Stay out of my wallet and my bedroom," "your liberty stops at my nose," and "don't tread on me." I will believe that things are taking a turn for the better in America when married gays are able to, and do, maintain large arsenals of automatic weapons, and tax collectors are, and do, not.

Comments

I Have a New Hero — 7 Comments

  1. Hell yah, I’m envious.

    I’m also disgusted that, even in North Dakota, there are a lot of candyasses who can’t just let someone be. I’m not saying that someone should turn a flamethrower on that neighbor’s house, but I am suggesting that a few crotch kicks would be appropriate.